Ask… ‘Why?’

Why do some people feel they can ask you very private or personal questions so easily or abruptly?

This is definitely a topic of interest for so many. And this truly depends on the situation – if you are on a date or getting to know someone more intimately and have each others best interests and best intentions then this personal or private communication should be a more effective way to get to know someone- but ‘over time’….

When dating you will be asking and asked many personal and private things. It’s to be expected ‘over time’ as you are getting to know one another.

And so it depends on the relationship you have with the individual at
the time, they are asking.

Communication is a beautiful level of intimacy- but maybe when you’re dealing with others who have no boundaries- or perhaps you have just met their acquaintance, it can be quite an intrusive and awkward experience.

For instance, when you have just met or barely know an individual who asks private or personal questions… this could be curiosity, they want to get to know you- or simply meaning the person is just nosy.
Nosy- However- could be troublesome down the line, especially if you have a mutual friend or loved one of a shared interest.

Know the intention- when asked such a personal/private question, be open to sharing – but also know your boundaries. Understanding that this persons intentions may not be valid enough for you to answer right away… and this could represent an intrusive controlling intent leading to an undermining or underlying agenda on their behalf…

Best way to take back your position? It’s wise to ask ‘why are you asking ?’ … a question of ‘why’, gives you the position to either answer or to create a boundary to better assess them and the situation- once you have an idea of what their intentions might be… (no one needs a troublemaker involved in any kind of relationship) then you might have a better assessment to help you discern a firm stance on what you are comfortable with sharing.

Remember, if this is someone whom you are not familiar and not engaged in a more intimate relationship with- you are not obligated to give them an answer- in fact, if you feel it’s unnecessary or unreasonable and not in anyone’s best interest… then a boundary needs to be set in expressing that it’s a private manner and perhaps someday you will come across this conversation again, and will cross that bridge.

Enjoy
Georgette Thomas 🌹